Love & War (Final)

Nicki walked side by side with the little girl who had been appearing in her dreams. Usually she wore black but today she had on an all white dress with pink shoes. Another little girl walked a couple feet ahead of them. She looked as though she was searching for something.

"You're doing good." The eight year old remarked to Nicki.

"Huh?"

"I thought for a minute that everything was gonna fall apart."

"You know, you should really stay outta grown folks business." Nicki said.

"Grown ups are dumb. You guys think you know everything but you never pay attention to what's important."

"I can't find her." The three year old ran towards the eight year old with tears in her eyes. Nicki assumed that they were siblings because they looked just alike.

"Hm." The eight year old thought. "Go in there."

She pointed towards an old train station and they all entered. Something caught the youngest childs attention and she took off running.

"Wait here, please." The eight year old looked worried. She turned her attention to where the child ran. "Hey! Come back!"

As soon as they were out of her sight the building began to shake. Suddenly it seemed like it was hundreds of people all trying to get out. Nicki pulled on a strangers arm.

"What's going on?" Nicki asked in a panic.

"The building. . .its. .its gonna collapse. It isn't stable. It isn't safe!" The lady ran away.

Nicki began pushing through the crowd. She scanned the crowd carefully as she searched for the girls. She spotted the three year old and ran to her.

"Hey, we gotta go." Nicki tried to calm the visibly distraught child.

"I can't find her." She cried.

"Listen to me." Nicki placed her hands on either side of her face and made the child look at her. "I'm going to find her but you need to go. You see that door?"

"Um hmm." She nodded and sniffled.

"Go stand outside and we will be right there."

"Hurry." She hugged Nicki tight before running towards the door as fast as her small legs would allow.

Nicki turned around to see the little girl sat in the middle of the station. Everyone else was gone. She quickly ran to the girl and snatched her up and began pulling her along.

"Are you crazy?" Nicki asked angry and the girl began dragging her feet and pulling away.

"Let me go!" She demanded.

"No! We have to get out of here."

"You don't need me any more. Let me go!" She snatched away and time stopped. Nicki looked at her confused.

"But your my-"

"I'm not your daughter!" She wiped her tears. "She is. She needs you Nicki. Let me go!"

"I-I can't just-"

"You can." She nodded.

Nicki nodded and bent down to face the little girl. They wiped at each others tears and then the little girl kissed Nicki's cheek. Nicki stood.

"I don't wanna see you anymore. Ok? Its not good for you. Let me go. I've been right this whole time so just. . .just listen."

"Ok." Nicki turned and walked out of the building. As soon as she was out it collapsed. 'Ow's' and 'Ah's' filled the crowd as well as screaming and crying. The little girl ran to Nicki and hugged her.

"Mommy!" Nicki picked her up.

"Hi, baby. You did good." She smiled.

"Where's Nicki?" She slid down Nicki's legs and looked around.

"Don't call me Nicki. Its Mommy."

"Nooo, Nicki. My friend. She helped me find you when I got lost."

"You mean-" Nicki began to breath hard. She tried to catch her breath but she couldn't. She felt herself falling.


Nicki woke up and clutched her chest. Her mouth was dry, she was sweaty, and breathing hard. She threw her legs over the bed and put on her robe and some shoes. Something in her wanted nothing more than to be by Safaree's side.

She walked along the dark beach alone. Suddenly she regretted leaving her bungalow alone in the middle of the night. Safaree seemed so far away in the night. The waves crashing upon the shore no longer seemed comforting. When she thought she heard someone behind she instantly began running.

"Nicki!" She felt a pull on her arm and turned to face her brother.

"You scared the shit outta me!" She hit him.

"Why are you out here alone? Where's Safaree?"

"I'm going to his bungalow now. He doesn't know I'm coming."

"Wait. Yall got seperate-"

"We're a red couple. Where's Tiffany?"

"Oh. Let me go get her. We'll walk you over."

Nicki waited impatiently for her brother and his wife to come back into view. When they approached she took note of her sister-in-law being wrapped in a towel and her brother carrying her swimsuit. Nicki smirked.

"I know yall didn't-"

"Nicki." Her brother said. His wife simply blushed.

"On the beach, Jay? Yall nasty." She laughed and he pushed her lightly.

"Stop." She whined and pushed him back harder.

"Come on now, Onika." He warned her. It didn't matter how old they got, she was still the annoying younger sister.

"Or what?" She pushed his head. "Stop being a-"

In one swift motion he picked her up and ran towards the water. His wife called after him to stop but he couldn't hear her over Nicki's screams.

"Say sorry." He demanded.

"No." She giggled.

"Imma throw yo ass in this water." He leaned their bodies foward.

"No! Please, no, Jay." She begged.

"Say it."

"I'm sorry."

"What else?" He said.

"Huh?"

"Like when we was kids."

"Are you fucking serious?" She asked with an attitude. "Put me down nigga."

"Say it or. . ."

"Jay is king." She mumbled.

"Louder."

"Jay is king and Onika is his peasant!" She screamed loudly.

"That's right." He walked over to the sand and put her down. She punched him in his chest once her feet were planted.

It took all of five minutes to make it to Safaree's bungalow and Nicki couldn't wait to get inside. She was so tired all the time with this pregnancy. They approached the door and Nicki knocked.

"Who is it?" Safaree asked sleepily.

"Its me, Far-" Before she could finish he snatched the door open with a panicked look on his face.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing." She turned to face her brother and his wife. "Thanks guys."

"No problem." Tiffany smiled.

"Night." Her brother said then began walking away.

"Night." Nicki and Safaree said in unison before entering the bungalow.

"What are you doing, Nicki." He looked at her funny as she sat on the side of the bed and took off her shoes.

"About to go to sleep." She pulled off her robe and tossed it onto a chair.

"Nicki, I would've came to you."

"But you didn't. I came here." She laid down. "Now, turn off the light and come hold us."

He sighed and shook his head at her demanding nature before doing exactly what was told. He laid beside her and pulled her close. He rubbed her stomach and talked to his unborn child until he heard his wife's faint snores. He pulled her in a little closer and held her a little tighter while he thanked God for the progress that they'd made.

"Safareeee." Nicki groaned and wiggled in his arms, pulling him from his thoughts.

"Hmm?"

"Too tight." She loosened his arms and then fell back asleep. He laughed a little before continuing his conversation with the most high.



Nicki and Safaree walked to Tina's office bungalow for their session. Tina smiled as they sat closer to each other than they usually did.

"How are you guys?" Tina asked.

"Like, a million times better than when we came." Nicki said and glanced at Safaree then back to Tina. "Its not perfect though."

"It never will be. Sometimes, you just love someone so much that you over look the imperfections. How was your evening together yesterday?"

"Good." Safaree said. "Its just. . ." He looked at Nicki.

"Go ahead Safaree." Tina said.

"It just seems like we always end up in these awkward moments."

"You will have those. You guys are relearning each other, getting to know each other again. You have to push through those moments though. Don't let them discourage you."

"Ok."

"So, today I want you guys to spend the day together." She handed Safaree a brochure. "You guys have all the freedom of the green couples today. Try to do at least two activities today and meet here tomorrow for our final session."

"Thank you." Nicki stood.

"Have fun guys and keep in mind all the progress you've made and the things you learned."

"Ok. Bye." Nicki smiled.

"See you tomorrow." Safaree waved and followed behind Nicki.

"Bye."


"Lets see." Nicki said looking at the brochure. "Yoga?"

"Nope." Safaree said walking beside her on the beach.

"Dancing?"

"Nope."

"Hmm. Painting?"

"No."

"Fishing?"

"Give it here." He took the brochure and looked it over. "Why you only say the boring stuff?"

"I was getting to the other stuff. . .eventually."

"Passion party?"

"No." She laughed.

"Why?"

"We need to get back to a passionate place first buddy."

"Jet skiing."

"Hell no!"

"Why? Come on, Nic. It'll be just like when you used to ride on the back of my bike."

"On water though, Safaree."

"We gone get life vest."

"I'm pregnant."

"That don't have shit to do with shit." He stopped walking and turned her to face him. He poked his lip out. "I'll go slow."

"Fine. Just don't ever make that ugly ass face again." She laughed.

"Yesssss!"

"Alright. Go put on your trunks and meet me at my room."

"Aight."

Fifteen minutes later Nicki stood in the mirror frowning at her midsection. Her stomach had yet to harden but she was gaining weight like crazy. A knock came on the door.

"Come in."

Safaree walked in and looked at her funny.

"Yo, why you ain't come open the door? I coulda been a killer."

"Please." She rolled her eyes. "I know that loud ass, obnoxious knock anywhere."

"You ready?"

"No." She moved pass him and grabbed her laptop and handed it to him. "I can't go jet skiing. I could hurt the baby." She looked at him as he read the information she pulled up. "Besides, I look disgusting."

"We can find something else to do." He closed the laptop. "You look fine though, Nic."

"No, I don't. I've almost gained nine pounds, Safaree. NINE POUNDS!"

He sighed, "You don't have another one you like?"

"Its not the swimming suit, Safaree. Its my fat ass!"

"Nicki, you don't look fat." He smiled. "But, lets just go grab lunch or something, chill out on the beach or something and then go to the outdoor movie. Ok?"

"Fine." She pouted and disappeared into the bathroom.

"I'll be back in ten minutes." He called out before leaving.



A few hours had past and the sun was now setting. Nicki and Safaree sat side by side watching it on the beach. The day went well minus the small argument that they had a little while ago which caused Nicki to walk away from Safaree. After waiting for her to return for a while he went after her. They had been sat in this same spot for almost twenty minutes in silence.

Nicki sighed, "I'm sorry."

"You good." He kept his eyes on the water but she stared at his profile.

"No, I'm not, Safaree. Its ok for you to either reject or accept my apology. Its like what Tina was saying. If we gone work we gotta start talking shit out. I mean, I tell you how I feel all the time, even though it get me in trouble, I still do. You just keep everything in and then go do something stupid to get back at me."

"Why you wanna work shit out now? What changed?"

"Nothings changed. I just realized some things."

"What?"

She sighed, "I love you. I can't imagine living this life without you right by me. I mean, you're the only love I've had for my adult life and I don't wanna find anyone new. I already tried. Yeah, you fucked up but I mean it was only one fuck up. It was huge but you've forgiven me for plenty of things."

"Most women don't stay with men who've cheated on them."

"Most men don't stay with women who've abandoned their family."

"I'm not most men." He shrugged.

"And I'm not most women. That's why we need each other, Faree."


After sitting through two chick flicks the couple decided to head to sleep. Nicki asked Safaree if she could stay with him for the night and he said yes.

"I'm bout to take a shower." He said as they entered the bungalow.

"Wait. Where you going?" She asked as he began to walk out of the patio door.

"Outdoor shower."

"Oh."

Fifteen minutes later Nicki found herself at the patio door watching him. His butt looked so tight and firm. She thought back to all the times when she would smack it for no reason. She giggled and he turned to look at her.

"I'm sorry." She said. "I just wanted to see what it was about."

"Wanna get in?" He asked.

"Um, sure."

She peeled off her clothes at the door before stepping out. The warm island breeze felt good as it brushed against her skin. She stepped in front of him in the shower. He instantly began washing her body, taking his time as if he were trying to memorize it. She turned around to face him. He looked beautiful under the moonlight and he thought the same of her. They both went in for a kiss. It became passionate quickly and as their breathing increased Nicki's guard began to rise. She pulled away.

"I-I shouldn't ha-"

"No, its fine." He nodded and rubbed her back after pulling her into a hug.

"Everything's so confusing." She cried.

"I know but its gone get better." He looked into her eyes. "Look, finish up and I'll bring you a towel." He reached for his towel and wrapped it around his body before going back in.

After she finished her shower she wrapped her towel around her and went inside. When she went over to the bed she seen the lotion, thong and tee shirt he left out for her.

"Why do you have my underwear perv?" She smirked as she let her towel fall and began applying lotion.

"You left it in my bag from the book tour."

"Oh, yeah."

"You also left this in there." He tossed a small vibrator to her and she began to laugh. "Yo, why you put that stuff in my bag?"

"You can never have too many pairs of underwear and how embarrassing would it be if security checks my bag and pulls that thing out?" She laughed.

"Oh, so I gotta be the one looking crazy?"

"Basically." She turned off the light and found his body in the dark. She wrapped her arms around him and he pulled her close.

"I'm sorry for everything and I accept your apology."

"Me too." She replied.

"I love you." They said in unison.

"I love you, too." They said in unison again and began laughing.

"Don't ever let me go, Faree."

"I won't."














PLEASE READ: Ok, I messed up with the dream sequences and I wanna explain it so that no one is confused. The very first child in the first dream with the cliff is Nicki's supposed child. Could be the new baby, could be MacKenzie or a child she lost already. The next kid appears in the park and is simply Nicki's supressed emotions in the form of her as a child. I didnt do a good job at differentiating the two. Sorry. They both appear in her dreams doing the same things relatively but the eight year old tells Nicki about herself and Nicki sort of needs her, or thinks she needs, to keep those emotions supressed and the three year old needs Nicki. That's all. Sorry again.