They Were One

Safaree and Nicki pretty much avoided each other since they had gotten back from the hospital last night. They treated MacKenzie for her new found banana allergy and sent them home. Nicki was still worried though. She cleaned her already clean house over again to keep herself from hovering over her child. Her phone began to vibrate on the bathroom counter. She quickly washed and dried her hands then answered.

"Hello?"

"Is my baby ok?" Candi asked worried.

"Yeah." She laughed. "They sent us home after they pumped my baby up with a bunch of drugs."

"Kenzie high as hell ain't she?" Candi laughed.

"Deadass though. We got home around twelve and she was already sleep. I woke her up around nine to change and feed her but she went right back to sleep."

"What was it?"

"She's allergic to bananas. She didn't even have a lot which I'm thankful for cause it could've been ten times worse."

"I know you freaking out still."

"I'm trying not to. Im scared to introduce her to new foods now though. Like, the look on my baby's face." She sighed.

"She gone be ok."

"Yeah, that's what Faree kept saying last night."

"Oh?"

"What?" Nicki laughed.

"He back to being Faree so that means-"

"Not exactly."

Nicki began telling Candi about how things had been transpiring between the two of them. Candi just listened to her instead of just jumping in and voicing her opinion. That's why Nicki didn't mind talking to her.

"So, was I wrong for going off like that?"

"I mean, I don't know. You should have at least listened to what he had to say. Plus, he was being honest with you."

"Yeah. Now I feel like shit, Candi. Thanks." She huffed.

"You're welcome." She laughed.

"Well, he should be up from the gym soon so I'll talk to you later."

"Ok. And Nic."

"Yeah?"

"Just take things one day at a time. Ok?"

"Ok."

After getting off the phone with her friend she put away all her cleaning supplies and walked to her room. She heard Safaree in the master bathroom. She pushed the cracked door open and sat on the counter. He sensed her presence while he showered.

"Sup?"

"I wanted to talk to you. . .about last night."

"What about it?"

"I wanted to ask you if you would finish telling me what you were saying about. . .you know. . .her." She heard him chuckle. "Nevermind then."

"No." He said before she could hop down. "I'm just not used to this but I told her no."

"And that's it?"

"Yeah, it was never that serious. I just wanted to let you know just in case you wanted to use my phone for some reason or saw it on the phone bill."

"That's it, Safaree? That's all you had to tell me?"

"Yup."

"Well, sorry for blowing up and thanks for telling me. Imma go check on Kenzie."

"Alright."

Nicki made her way to MacKenzie's room. She looked into the crib expecting to see her asleep but she was up on her hands and knees rocking back and forth, smiling.

"What are you doing little lady bug?" She smiled and reached in to pick her up. "You hungry mamacita?"

Nicki walked to the kitchen and placed MacKenzie in her high chair. Not only was she scared to feed her anything new, she was scared to feed her period. She stayed up most of the night researching allergies and found out that they can sometimes develop out of no where. A person can go their whole life not allergic to something and suddenly it changes. What if that happened to MacKenzie one day? She was just a baby and had yet developed the sense to seek help when needed. She sighed and began looking through MacKenzie's food cabinet.

"What's it gonna be Kenny? We got peas, sweet potatoes, chicken and apples-" She stopped when she heard MacKenzie squeal. "Chicken and apples it is."

"Such a coon." Nicki looked back at Safaree who was looking through the refrigerator and smirked.

"Don't call my baby no coon."

She opened the container of baby food and emptied it into MacKenzie's small bowl before heating it up. After it was done she pulled a chair up next to the high chair. Safaree was already sat on the other side keeping MacKenzie entertained. Nicki just stared at them for a minute. He was a good father above anything else.

"Oh, my bad." He said pulling MacKenzie's hand from his face in which she was repeatedly slapping.

"You know what. . . How about you feed her?"

"Um, ok." He took the bowl and spoon and began feeding her.

Nicki got up and went to stand by the kitchen sink. She hovered over the sink while she looked outside at nothing. She let her mind wander to the previous night.


"Hey, mommy? She's fine."

"Oh, thank God."

"Yeah, they have her sleeping now. We got here just in time."

"I'm so glad to hear that."

"You didn't tell Micaiah did you?"

"No. I know you wanted to."

"Can you put him on? Even if he's sleep." She didn't know why but she had the strong urge to just hold all of her children but since Micaiah was away she at least wanted to hear his voice.

"Mommy?" His voice was full of sleep.

"Yes, baby. Were you sleep?"

"Hmm." She laughed a little at him being half sleep therefore paying half attention.

"Listen, mommy has to tell you something about sissy."

"What?"

"She had an accident."

"Accident? What's wrong?" She heard the sleep in his voice change to fear and realized she didn't choose her words wisely.

"Nothing. . .anymore. She just had an allergic reaction to bananas. It was hard for her to breath but she's ok now."

"I wanna come home."

"No, baby." She laughed. "If you want to you can but MacKenzie is fine. I promise. I just wanted to be the one to tell you instead of you hearing from someone else."

"Ok."

"So, your gonna stay?"

"A little longer if that's ok."

"Of course but you have to come home sometime."

"I will."

"Put Grandma back on."

"Night Mama."

"Night babe."

"Hello."

"I just wanted to say goodnight and tell you that if Micaiah is too much of a handful that me or Safaree will come an-"

"He's fine, Nicki." She laughed. "Oh, but I meant to ask you when were you going to find some more help?"

"Like a nanny?'

"Yes. You need to start looking before the new baby-"

"Micaiah told you?" She asked irritated.

"He didn't have to. It was all in your face and the way you tried to lean away from me when I hugged you. You did the same with Micaiah. Why are you hiding it?"

"I'm not. I just. . . I just wanna be a hundred percent sure that everything is ok before I go announcing it."

"I can respect that but you need help."

"Ma, please."

"You're going to have two small children, Micaiah will be back in school with all his activities, you and Safaree have your things going on and-"

"Ma, I can handle it. All of it."

"Just think about it Nicki."


"Nicki." Safaree pulled her from her thoughts.

"Yeah."

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing. Why?"

"You been staring out the window for like ten minutes like a weirdo."

"Oh, I was just looking at this deer. I'm always curious as to how close they gone come to the house."

"Niggas get closer and closer every summer." He laughed.

"I think Micaiah ass be out there feeding them." She shook her head.

"That nigga think he crocodile Dundee or whatever that nigga name was." Nicki laughed before going to pick up MacKenzie.

"Get her a juice bottle, Safaree." 

After MacKenzie had her juice Safaree and Nicki played with her in their living room for a little while. Nicki was glad that her blow up the previous night didn't set their progress back any. Once she began to get sleepy they carried her up to her room and put her in her crib. MacKenzie instantly began crying and fighting her sleep.

"Where's her-"

"Here." Safaree handed her pacifier to Nicki.

When Nicki put the pacifier in MacKenzie's mouth she rolled over and let it fall out. She got up on her hands and knees and continued to cry.

"Kenzie, please." She laid her back down but MacKenzie rolled over and did the same thing.

"It might be that tooth finally breaking through."

"No, I just put Orajel on it."

"Just leave her then. She'll fall asleep eventually when she tire out."

"No."

"Nicki, you can't keep babying her like this."

"She's a baby!"

"But she need to get some indepence. When the new baby gets here-"

"Fuck it! You raise these got damn kids by yourself since you know everything."She didn't mean to be harsh towards him but her conversation with her mother had her second guessing herself.

She pushed pass him and went into their bedroom. She sat on the side of the bed and let her leg wildly tap. Safaree walked out of his daughters room and closed the door behind him before going to their room. He sat beside Nicki.

"I don't think I can do it." She sniffled.

"What?"

"Two babies, Micaiah and all of his stuff, working on us, my career. . .its just too much. I mean, we didn't plan on another baby. Everything revolves around MacKenzie for this next year or so. . .not this one too."

"Its gone work out, Nic."

"But, I don't even know what I'm walking into right now. Sometimes I catch myself wondering if I want certain things and then I feel like shit." She wiped at her tears.

"Things like what?" She didn't answer. She just stared at the ground. "Wanting things like what, Nicki."

"Another baby." She began to cry hard and he wrapped his arms around her and let her rest her head on his chest. "I know it's selfish because we lost two but I'm so tired all the time and hungry and sick but I can never take care of me because MacKenzie is crying about something or I'm worried about Micaiah or you and the emails and phone calls from work are nonstop. I-I really don't think I can handle it all."

"That's your problem though, Nicki." He pulled her up to face him and she wiped her face. "You're always trying to carry the world on your shoulders like I won't help and then when I try you get mad. . .like just now. I shouldn't have to beg you to let me help. You shouldn't have to fall apart to realize it.'' He stroked her cheek. "I love you."

That was the first time in along time that he had said those words and truly meant it. She scanned his face for a while before grabbing his hand and pulling him towards her. They began kissing and helping each other undress. Nicki crawled backwards on the bed, with him hovering her body and placing kisses all over her, until she was in the center. He searched her face to make sure that this was what she wanted and for the first time in along time her eyes read that she wanted him. Her guard was down.

"I love you too."

 She stroked his cheek before placing her hand on the back of his neck to pull him in for a kiss. As he pushed inside of her she let out a long, drawn out gasp. He fit her perfectly, in every way.

"I love you." He said every time he pushed inside of her.

"I love you." Was always the response when she felt him pulling away.

She wanted to remember every second of this, every inch of him. This time was better than anytime they'd ever made love. Maybe it was the built up tension. Or possibly the concept that this might be the deciding factor in their next chapter. Maybe it was the fact that neither broke eye contact the entire time. Finally, for the first time in more than a year they were connected: mind, body, and spirit. They were one.











That last part was the one that I said that I actually like on Twitter like days ago. Lol. Um, they good now so yeah. :) This is the end of the story. Thanks for reading.





No. . . I'm kidding.





Bye.